The Day the Earth Stood Still
I remember the day like it was yesterday. My boys and I were headed to our weekly CiCi’s Pizza dinner. I asked my new squeeze, Babs, to meet us that afternoon. We had been dating for a short period of time and I was really enjoying getting to know her. She was absolutely beautiful, very witty and a joy to be around. Long-term companion? I wasn’t sure yet.
As Babs entered the restaurant, my boys reacted as they always did when they saw her- with genuine excitement. We made small talk and then the kids ran off to play. I asked her “How was your day?” and she responded “I am pregnant.”
She then began to cry. Why was she crying? Was she upset with her choice of men to procreate with? Was she afraid that I would abandon her and the baby? Was she concerned of what public perception would be being a single mom? All of these thoughts ran through my mind in a matter of moments.
And then she proceeds to turn red and cry even more. In her eyes I saw fear and disappointment. In the calmest voice I could muster, I grabbed her hand and said “Babs, you can’t cry in CiCi’s Pizza.”
For me that was the defining moment in our relationship.
My immediate concern was her well-being. We talked many times of the shortcomings of her father throughout her childhood and even now as an adult. I wanted her to know that I would never abandon my child regardless of what our situation turned out to be. I was a real man who believed very deeply that a man handles his responsibility.
I never had any doubt as to what type of mother Babs would be because she is phenomenal with my boys. My boys are normally reserved with new people and I never introduce them to someone I am dating until I know that this person will be around for a while. When they met Babs they were immediately drawn to her. It’s something that took me aback but made me take notice.
I was most concerned with my ability to take care of my new family. I knew that financially they would always be comfortable, but I wondered if I had recovered enough from my divorce to be the man I needed to be for them. A man who has been hurt in the past is a man who proceeds with extreme caution and at the first sign of trouble is ready to bail. For a man that is the easiest thing to do rather than to stay and work things out.
I won’t lie and say that this pregnancy has been a cakewalk because it hasn’t. In a short amount of time, we have had to learn each other quickly and also adapt to being parents together. I can honestly say that Babs has been the glue that has kept us together.
So now, being only a few weeks away from delivery, my days are filled with thoughts of my beautiful lady and our daughter that will be here soon. I thank GOD every day for blessing me with a tremendous woman in my life and the daughter that I have always desired.
In me they will never have a perfect man, but they will always have a man in their lives that will always be thinking of ways to make their lives easier. An honorable man whom they can always be proud of and a man that will always love them.
Thank you GOD for my tremendous blessing.